The Adventures of Rita Repulsa
by RedCrystalRanger
Summary: Rita is getting tired of things on her Moon Palace. Watch her many adventures on Earth and in Space!! Chapter 4 added..please R+R!
1. She's Getting Old

Note: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is merely a spoof of Rita Repulsa and the show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers". Please R+R  
  
The Adventures of Rita Repulsa  
  
--Chapter 1: She's Getting Old  
  
by RedCrystalRanger  
  
"I'm getting tired of this!!!" Rita Repulsa screamed angrily after the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers finish another monster.  
  
"I am sorry my empress..." said Goldar.  
  
"Sorry?! You're sorry?! All you do is sit there talking, and all the time your jaw isn't even moving! Your upper lip is moving! How messed up is that?!" screamed Rita.  
  
"My empress, please forgive me. I will make it up to you! I will send down my own monster!" Goldar screams as a new monster appears.  
  
"Oh great, another pathetic person in a costume with a foam mask." Rita sighs.  
  
"I can do it I can do it give me a chance!" The monster exclaims very loudly.  
  
"Go...good luck." Rita sighs.  
  
As the monster lands on earth, he is instantly destroyed by the Power Rangers.  
  
"Oh I have such a head ache!!!" Rita screams.  
  
"Take a damn asprin!" Goldar yells.  
  
________  
  
Will Rita's head ache every cease to exist? Will Goldar's lower jaw start moving? Why do people dress up with foam masks?! Find out next time on..."The Adventures of Rita Repulsa"!  
  
Next Chapter--"Race for the Asprin" 


	2. The Race for Asprin

Note: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is merely a spoof of Rita Repulsa and the show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers". Please R+R  
  
The Adventures of Rita Repulsa  
  
--Chapter 2: The Race for Asprin  
  
by RedCrystalRanger  
  
"Fine then! I'll go down to earth and get the asprin!" Rita screams as she teleports to earth.  
  
On earth, she walks the streets looking for a store. She sees a store entitled "Adult Toys and More".  
  
"Hmm...they might have asprin there since only adults get head aches...right? Oh well. I'll go in and check." she says to herself as she walks in, people still staring at her. She goes up to the man behind the counter.  
  
"Hey you! Do you sell any asprin here?!" She asks on the top of her lungs.  
  
"Look lady, this is 'Adult Toys and More'. We sell only adult toys not asprin. I can tell YOU'VE been having a nice sex life by looking at the get up you are in--" he is cut off by Rita whipping out her staff quickly.  
  
"LIAR!" she screams as she zaps him and he explodes. "You are a liar!....You must have asprin here. Oh well. I'll check some where else." she exits the store and looks across the street.  
  
She notices a building entitled "CVS".  
  
"CVS eh? Must be some sort of secret code..oh well. They must have asprin there." she says as she enters the store. She goes up to a clerk.  
  
"You there..do you sell any asprin?!" she screams "I have a head ache!!!"  
  
"Ooh lady take some motrin." he suggests.  
  
"Whatever just take me to it!!!!" she screams as he leads the way. He shows her the many brands, then leaves.  
  
"Hmm...what's this!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!" Rita screams very loudly. "Motrin's too expensive..and I can't take pills!! I'll stick with this.....Nyquil...whatever it is. It must help me!" she says as she grabs the medicine and goes to the exit.  
  
"Hey you! You gotta pay for that!" a clerk yells to her.  
  
"LIAR!" She screams as she whips out her staff and zaps him. She then escapes to the moon. On the moon a few minutes later, Goldar can't find his empress! He goes into her room and sees her sleeping. He looks down on the ground and sees an empty bottle of NyQuil. He picks it up and reads it.  
  
"NO!!!!" he screams "My empress! She'll be asleep for three thousand years!!!!"  
  
________  
  
Will Rita ever wake up? Will Goldar's upper jaw continue to move? Why did Rita call the clerks 'liars' today?! Find out next time on..."The Adventures of Rita Repulsa"!  
  
Next Chapter--"Three Thousand Years Later" 


	3. Three Thousand Years Later

Note: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is merely a spoof of Rita Repulsa and the show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers". Please R+R  
  
The Adventures of Rita Repulsa  
  
--Chapter 3: Three Thousand Years Later  
  
by RedCrystalRanger  
  
Three thousand years have passed as Rita Repulsa awakens...  
  
"Ugh...never again" she says as she looks at her Nyquil bottle and throws it. A loud clunk and an  
  
"Ouch!" from a masculine voice is heard. Rita looks to her right as she sees Goldar in her bed.  
  
"Ah! GET OUT!" she screams as he falls out of the bed and gets up.  
  
"My empress...I had no idea you woke up! I thought you died! I had to reproduce before our army was finished!" Goldar says as little tiny Goldar and Ritas run around.  
  
"You-you mean you...you...." she notices the mini-aliens running around. "I HAVE CHILDREN!!!! NO!!!!!" she gets up and looks at Goldar. "LIAR!" she screams as she zaps Goldar's upper lip, which falls off. "That was annoying me." she says as she looks down. "Ah!!" she runs out of her chamber as the little mini Ritas chase after her. "Ah! Ah! They're attacking!" she says as she teleports to earth. "Oh Dear Bob.." she says to herself.   
  
The mini-aliens teleport to earth and begin chasing after Rita. "Ah! Ah! Ah!" she screams as she runs down the streets of Angel Grove.  
  
________  
  
Will Rita ever escape the attacking minis? Will Goldar's upper jaw ever heal? How did Rita give birth while sleeping?! Find out next time on..."The Adventures of Rita Repulsa"!  
  
Next Chapter--"Attack of the Mini Ritas!" 


	4. Attack of the Mini Ritas!

Note: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is merely a spoof of Rita Repulsa and the show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers". Please R+R  
  
The Adventures of Rita Repulsa  
  
--Chapter 4: Attack of the Mini Ritas!  
  
This chapter contains strong language and some things that may be offensive towards certain people. If it's offensive towards you, do not read any further.  
  
by RedCrystalRanger  
  
"Oh my GOD!" Rita screams as the mini people chase after her. "Mini people! Mini people! GET AWAY! AGH!" she screams to the little Ritas as she coincidently runs past a group of midgets.  
  
"What's her problem?" one of them asks.  
  
"Hater." the female midget says.  
  
"Rita! Rita! Rita!" the mini Ritas scream as they chase after her. "Get back! Get back! I'm armed and dangerous!" she screams as she holds out a nail filer.  
  
"Rita! Rita! Rita!" they continue to chant as they close in on her. She grabs one of them and holds the nail filer to it's throat. "I'm going to give you what you DESERVE!" Rita screams as she grabs the mini Rita's hand and begins filing her nails.  
  
The mini Ritas begin to grab her and they each hold on to her. "Ah! Ah! Ah!" she screams as she throws them off.  
  
"Empress Rita!" one of them scream. "Get back you....you...DOUCHE BAG." she says deeply. She then turns a corner and runs into a 7/11. "Get back all of you!" she screams as the people.  
  
"Excuse me ma'am--" one of the clerks starts as Rita pulls out her staff. "LIAR! LIAR!" she screams as she zapps everyone in sight, leaving her all alone. She then runs over and locks the doors.  
  
"Whew..I'm safe." she says to herself as the mini Ritas wait outside. "Oh great...I'm trapped in here!" she screams.  
  
________  
  
Will Rita ever destroy the mini Ritas? Will she live in the 7/11 forever? Should I stop asking questions?! Find out next time on..."The Adventures of Rita Repulsa"!  
  
Next Chapter--"Two Weeks and the Campell Soup Defense" 


End file.
